It’s funny creating a well-being centre. At the moment I don’t have the feeling of ‘being well’ at all! With the budget getting a beating everyday, which requires Lou and I having emergency budget meetings as our evening entertainment, we have certainly entered a critical stage of development.
And yesterday was a 12 hour day of filming too. Although the camera was not rolling continuously, anything that I said to the camera man that could make good telly made him grab his camera as he asked me to say it again for the camera. But, in fairness, it’s a fantastic experience to be filmed for one of the most watched programmes in our house. And Zak, the camera man, has been brilliant with the kids.
Finlay had the opportunity to hold the camera and film me strimming some of the land. I’m not sure what would’ve looked more odd to any passers by. A man strimming 2000 square meters of overgrown land with a battery operated strimmer that lasts for half an hour before needing recharging or a 7 year old filming it with a 7kg professional camera on his shoulder. Probably both.
But for anybody that points out that I need a bigger strimmer I quickly remind them of our emergency budget meetings! So the battery operated one will do for now. Plus it makes good telly.
Things are progressing well. Even the geckos have been interested in how things are going. If we continue at this pace then we will have a guest house to rent out for the beginning of summer. The out building work will begin after but this will be a much smaller project with, we hope, an income to plug the holes in the leaky finances. So we might have a little more breathing space by then.
A gecko looks on from the window shutter.
In the meantime Zak, or indeed Finlay, will continue to film the ups and downs of our creation. All being well.
As Zak, the camera man, mic’d me up and briefed Lou and I on the sort of questions he would ask once the camera started rolling, a million answers whizzed through my head.
I had prepared for this moment, after all I was a dedicated viewer of A New Life In The Sun after watching each series multiple times. I knew the sort of footage they were wanting.
And then the red light appeared on the camera as he asked, “So, why did you move to Portugal?”
“……………” The moments after that were a blur. Seconds felt like hours as I tried to find a word or two. I looked at Lou as she eventually began to answer.
My big TV moment flashed before my eyes as I nodded and agreed with Lou’s reply to the question.
I had answers to his question. Quality of life. New adventure. It’s a beautiful country. Good food. Sun. Brexit. Business opportunity. The answers were there! But not in that moment.
I did, however, pull myself together to film what was 9 hours of potential footage for the programme. By the end of the day It felt more natural. He will be filming until September by which time I fully expect that I’ll be such a professional in front of the screen I’ll be demanding 138 green seedless grapes and my fan letters to be left in my room each day.
But there’s important stuff to do. As much as the filming seems like it will be an enjoyable experience and the exposure for our business will be great once the show is aired, there’s 20,000 square metres of land to sort out. This includes three forests, two houses, multiple out buildings including a pig pen, chicken coup and other storage units.
It’s the forests that kept me awake last night though. Unkept, these can be dangerous when the really hot weather comes. Wild fires are frequent in the Portuguese countryside and can have devastating effects. I’ve already downloaded an app that tells me when a fire is reported and by how many of the bombeiros (fire department) are dealing with it.
By the end of April, landowners are legally required to have their land prepared for the summer. The government threatens fines of up to 10,000 euros for those who do not comply with the ‘land cleaning’ rules. Luckily, the local community is very helpful and knowledgeable at dealing with this issue and are wanting to offer their time and equipment to sort out the land for their new ‘estranheiro’ neighbours. After all, it benefits them too. They don’t need a city slicker from England like me causing any wildfires in the village!
The past week has seen lots of development on the cottage house. This will be rented out and with finances dwindling the finished article can’t come soon enough. If we can open for the summer season then that will be a welcome boost for our funds to be then able to continue the work on my gym studio, Lou’s therapy room and bar/patio area.
Zak, the camera man, will be back on Monday and Tuesday to follow us working on it all again. Hopefully I can hold it together and answer simple questions this time.
But for now I’ll leave you with a few more updated pics from the week that was.
Massage room and bar/patio area with the gym studio in the distance.Builders taking down a water tank from the roof of where our bathroom currently is.Without the unsightly water tank and with a lick of paint.A new concrete floor laid in the rental cottage.The first floor window is getting prepared for a door with a Juliette balcony.
In my line of work, a progress picture has always meant stripping down to your undies and taking a photo of yourself every month or so in order to see the progress you are making in your fitness goals.
Whether this be a bulk, a cut, muscle build or fitting into a certain outfit, I find that progress pictures can be a much better way of evidencing your efforts than the weighing scales or fat calipers.
But I have a progress picture of a different sort at the moment and it is a building. The essence of the progress picture theory remains the same in my eyes though, and that is that whilst it is good to keep a check on your work, you must always remember the end goal. You might be unimpressed for some time, but if you trust the process then the outcome will be pleasing to you.
So, what is the process? I have a realistic plan in place that I can stick to with timelines and budgets. I involve professionals where necessary. I understand that the outcome of the process will make me very happy instead of being extremely unhappy in a previous life. This happiness means a better life for me and my family. That becomes my daily motivation. When things don’t go to plan or I’m not happy with a progress picture then I can rationalize with this. It is for the greater good and I continue to trust the process that has been laid out by myself and the professionals.
So, whether it’s a fitness plan or building a rental property, there are parallel lines that can be drawn. Either way, determination, tears, asking for help and documenting the progress all seem to be good ingredients.
I’ll leave you with a few progress pics of my own and keep you updated. For now friends, have a great day.
The building before work started.One of the downstairs rooms.A view for the top floor.A bit of a clear out needed in the bottom room.After a day with the builders, the areas are emptied and the interior walls knocked down.A new roof is on our to-do list.The roof and door will be raised and a new first floor will be created.A picture of what will be some lovely double doors leading onto the courtyard from the bedroom suite (right) the small door will be filled to create the bathroom area.
Writer Walter Elliot once wrote, “Perseverance is not a long race. It is many short races one after the other.”
I have said this many times during my personal training and therapy sessions, but I needed to remind myself of this today when I discovered a startling statistic held by my family and I.
Since October we have lived and slept in eight different houses, caravans, apartments and hotels without having a permanent home.
These include a caravan in Filey, a hotel in Manchester, a house in Malton, a house in Leeds, an apartment in Porto, an apartment in Palhais (Portugal), an apartment in Coimbra (Portugal) and an apartment in Sertá (Portugal.)
And with a VISA appointment due later this month that takes two days, we will be staying overnight in Leria. Thanks for that 52%. Hopefully your Sunlit Uplands are going well for you.
To be honest, I’m absolutely sick of traveling and living out of a suitcase. Tomorrow night, for the first time in 5 months, we will be staying in our own home.
Lou and I have been concerned about how the boys will cope but they have, for the most part, been absolutely brilliant. Micro managing this part of parenting has been extremely difficult though. After all, we would not have continued with this journey if the boys had not been fully in agreement with it too.
We, as a family, had to persevere. From caravan to house to apartment and hotel room. Each one a short race of its own. But that’s all each one was. A short race.
So what’s my point?
This is important to remember. You have a goal to reach. But so many goals are abandoned because we see it as a long race. Eventually, a long race can become demoralising, tedious and unobtainable. Simply put, you need to break it down into smaller tasks that can be achieved before moving onto the next task.
In effect, I have used the SMART method of achieving the end goal. I have spoken about the effectiveness of SMART before.
S… Be Specific with numbers and deadlines.
M…Be sure that the goal is Measurable and trackable.
A…make the goal attainable, challenging and possible.
R…be Realistic and honest with yourself.
T…remain Time-Bound and stick to deadlines.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve questioned every letter of this acronym in the past 14 months. That’s natural. But I have never doubted the process. I am always able to reason with it eventually.
This has never been a long race. It has always been lots of short races that need to be tackled one at a time. Hopefully, that makes me smart.
A few years ago I trained a man who weighed more than he was happy with. And this wasn’t just an aesthetic thing. His doctor had told him that his BMI was high which categorised him as obese.
During his consultation, he gave me an idea of his eating habits. Along with the convenience and takeaway foods mentioned he also announced that he ‘ate a banana every day, sometimes two.’
He then suggested that maybe he should stop eating bananas in order to cut down the amount of calories he was consuming each day.
Immediately I could identify the problem. He wanted to pass the bananas off as the one food item that was tipping the balance between him gaining weight and losing weight.
A banana has around 100 calories. So potentially he is consuming 200 calories on this tasty, nutritious, vitamin packed fruit. That is 200 calories well spent, but he didn’t want to admit that it was. He wanted to hear that the crisps and chocolate were well spent. He wanted me to tell him that 3 takeaways a week was normal and it’ll ‘save on the washing up’. But he didn’t want me to tell him how many calories are in the five pints of lager he regularly drinks at the pub.
Of course, I told him to keep the bananas. I also told him to keep some of the food that wasn’t so nutritious. After all, takeaway foods aren’t the whole problem here, it’s the amount of takeaways.
But I knew that I had to work on his attitude surrounding food much more than I had to work on his training program. He was a good trainee. In fact he has been one of the most hardworking trainees I have trained in my ten years as a PT. He was always on time. He learnt good form quickly and he would spend extra time in the gym and go for long walks on rest days.
But the bananas had left his diet. In fact most fruit had. There’s this misconception that fruit sugars are bad for us. Fruit is indeed high in natural sugar, but this enters the bloodstream at a much slower pace than refined sugar. That is why we get a sugar spike from a sweet treat and it can often be an overload on the body.
My client had targeted the banana as the problem. This is absolutely normal and very common.
It seems to be human nature to blame the one thing that is easy to get rid of rather than tackle the bigger issue.
When I lived in Scarborough there was a news report that said that the council had identified seagulls pooing in the sea as the major reason for the sea pollution in South bay. The pollution meant that the beach did not receive its blue flag award.
So if it was the seagulls causing the pollution then the public no longer had to be concerned about the chip factory that had been discharging starchy waste into the sea for the past 50 years.
Those damn seagulls. Flying around their natural habitat. Pooing.
But I understand the problem for the council. This factory is a major employer to the local community. It is important to have a thriving industry in the area.
The culling of seagulls is easier to address. We all want to believe that this will solve the pollution problem.
I have had a recent issue in not being able to come to terms with a problem. Having just bought a trendy coffee machine where I put a capsule in and out comes a silky smooth coffee I began to drink more caffeine. These capsules had an ‘intensity’ of ten which, by all accounts, is strong! I quickly became addicted to drinking this deliciously intense coffee.
By midday I was bouncing about my apartment like Michael Gove at a rave.
But recently I have been getting pretty bad headaches. At first I blamed the atmospheric pressure, then my sleeping pattern, my contact lenses, the sun, my aftershave.
I briefly considered it to be the coffee intake but I shrugged it off and brewed myself another shot of espresso. That is until Lou sat me down and had to break the news to me.
She believed it to be the coffee and told me to halve my coffee consumption and see how I feel. Of course, she was correct. I just didn’t want her to be.
The daily banana is in no way to blame for obesity. The seagull crapping in the sea isn’t to blame for not receiving a blue flag beach. And a few splashes of brut behind my ear is not the cause of my headaches.
In each case, something that we want and feel that we need is a much more contributing factor. And you can bet that in every similar scenario there is a resolution and a compromise. We don’t need to give up something that we enjoy completely.
After three years of working with me, my client changed his weight, his attitude to food and his whole life. And we did it all whilst allowing the birds to crap in the sea.
If there is one guarantee in life it is that the mainstream gyms will be buzzing with new members who have promised themselves a healthier start to the year. The new year’s resolutioners. And their journey, hopefully, is a great one. I know lots of people who started a successful journey based on a new year’s resolution. But there are many who don’t have the same success. They give up. This message is for anybody who has just begun their journey and how they can stay on track.
It is common knowledge between Personal Trainers that the gym looks like this every new year…
The January Rush
Especially in the mainstream gyms, it can be difficult to get onto any of the equipment due to the influx of new members mixed with the regulars. The PT can spot the new member immediately. They flit from one machine to the other with little direction. Form, especially in the free weight section, can be erratic. But for the most part the new member will stick to machines.
The PT will begin to plant the seed that you might need their help. They might offer an induction or consultation straight away if they are pushy, but also a good PT will simply just be present to answer questions.
The February Frustrations
Despite January being great for the gym, it is not necessarily the best month for a PT. A new member won’t generally just sign up with a PT they’ve just met. Also, most people think that they can do it by themselves. After all, how difficult can working a treadmill be? But new members can have unrealistic targets and in no way is a treadmill (or any machine) the best place to start. Frustrations arise. They’re not seeing the results they expected.
Their gym visits become less regular unless, and this is where the patient PT reaps the rewards, the member asks for help, tips, advice and a price list.
The March Sleepers
A sleeping membership is a reference to a gym member who pays for a membership but does not attend its services. By march and the dust has settled, according to statists, about 18% of people paying for a gym membership become sleepers. They have lost motivation, got bored, found other interests or just found life getting in the way.
What To Do Before You Get To March!
* Seriously consider a good PT. They’ll stick out a mile. Watch their interactions with their current clients. Approach them for advice. They should give free advice without being too pushy. If they’re too pushy then they’re desperate for custom. If they say that they’re really busy but will try to find a slot for you then they’re lying. There’s always room for a new client. Some trainers also work online with clients without the face to face sessions. This works out cheaper but can be a good option because of my next piece of advice…
* The biggest reason for people quitting the gym is their motivation (or lack of it). A good PT should be able to give you the determination and motivation that you need. Almost every day they should be asking ‘how do you feel today?’ and tracking your workout progress, offering challenges and fun targets. You don’t need to see them in person for them to do that.
* But if employing a PT is still something that you don’t want to do then consider this quote from author Zig Ziglar…”People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing, that’s why we recommend it daily.”
You see, your motivation needs working on daily. Just because you ate the full box of Quality Streets on Christmas day and promised yourself a gym membership doesn’t mean you’ll give a shit come March. After all, there are 18% of gym members who don’t.
Every Sunday I would ask my clients to plan their meals and their gym visits for the week. Have they booked the classes they wish to attend? Do they have packed lunch ideas for work so that they don’t feel the need to stop off at Gregg’s or Maccy D’s?
Any of my clients who were having a tough time of it (everybody does, even professional athletes) I would ask them for their reasons why they came to me. In some way, it was a call for help. But why?
I’ve had just about every reason given to me over the ten years that I worked in mainstream gyms and online. From eating disorders, beating depression or self harm, a charity run and to making the next Olympics. Plus, there were many of my clients who simply wanted to feel better about themselves and feel that they were doing something proactive.
I would ask them to give themselves 5 minutes each morning as they open their eyes to think about these reasons. What would achieving their target for that day mean to them? How does it make them feel? What about not doing it? How does that affect their mood by the end of the day?
This ‘self assessment’ should be done daily. And with it we will find the reason why we do it. I love a workout, but I need my daily motivation too! I need to know my ‘why?’. I have two small children. I want to be healthy enough to see them grow up. I want to be active enough to play football with them and (in later life) my grandkids. My wife and I are starting up a new business in a different country. I need to be mentally strong for the challenges ahead and exercise keeps my focus. I want to look and feel good about myself and when I’m really old I want to be able to get out of a chair unaided. My motivation isn’t about staying alive so much as having a quality of life as I get older.
We will all have our reasons, but it’s remembering them and acting on it daily that will take you past March in the gym.
The past has gone. For all the good bits, the bad bits and all the bits in-between, you cannot change your past.
But what if you could by living the present by one simple rule?
Psychologist Victor Frankl will be able to explicate my introduction with this quote…
“Live as if you were living already for the second time and as if you had acted the first time as wrongly as you are about to act now.”
When I first read this I had to replay it through my head several times to truly understand what Frankl meant by this. My brain chewed through it like a sticky toffee glued to my teeth but eventually I tasted the essence of its flavour. It was sweet.
Frankl is inviting us to understand that the past can still be changed and corrected as long as we acknowledge that the present is the past.
Without knowing of this revelation let alone understanding it, I could not live by this several years ago. A mixture of immaturity, pig headedness and selfishness meant that I am now left with a string of regrets that I wish I could change.
For example, the way I have spoken to a friend or relative that was unkind. I have felt, in moments, that they were trying to hurt my feelings or in some way ruin my day and piss on my parade. My emotions heightened and out of control, I have said things that I know would hurt them too.
I have never made a habit of this but there are moments in my life which stand out in my mind that I wished had never happened.
What if I had acted differently? What if I had considered Frankl’s advice before becoming irrational with someone who I love?
What if, in that moment, I had taken a deep breath, considered my options and chose to act in the right way?
Because, when you strip back the quote, all it means is to think about your actions before doing or saying something you will regret. You can’t go back in time to correct mistakes so take extra care to get it right the first time.
There’s no time machine, but we do actually possess something much more powerful than that. We have the ability to perceive what is right and wrong and control, evaluate and execute our actions. We have a conscience.
Looking back, from a selfish point of view, had I reacted differently in certain situations I would have felt better about myself. Making someone else feel rubbish does nothing for the soul. It can turn you bitter.
Before the past becomes regrettable, make some good choices in the present while you can. Seize that moment to make yourself and others around you feel better. In your head, consider the different outcomes of the actions you’re about to take.
I like Christmas. Well, I don’t mind it. The enthusiasm has come back a bit since becoming a dad. But every year when December hits and I hear the first dulcet tones of another festive Bublé effort, I strap myself in for the month ahead and hope I don’t lose my mind.
The week between Christmas and the new year hits me the hardest. It doesn’t even have a name. It’s just known as ‘the week between Christmas and New year.’
“Oh, Shay, when shall we have a catch up?”
“I dunno, should I just contact you the week between Christmas and New year?”
It’s like purgatory.
The day after boxing day is when we restock the alcohol, which is incredible really, seeing as we seem to buy the whole stock of a Wetherspoons pub on Christmas eve. This is a Christmas eve tradition as we always believe that the supermarkets are closed forever after Christmas eve when, in fact, they reopen on boxing day.
I need a stiff drink to get over another play of ‘Santa Baby’, so leading up to Christmas is when I start to drink stuff that I wouldn’t think of drinking at any other time of year. Brandy and Irish cream goes in my coffee. Whisky and dry. Jack Daniels. Snowball. I mean, WTF even is that?!
The week between Christmas and new year takes a similar path. We also discovered that many of the locals in rural Portugal have basements dedicated to brewing their own wine. So by the time Antonio had given me his last drop of rocket fuel on new year’s day I was ready to have some time away from alcohol.
A week has passed and I am still in no way ready to drink anything alcoholic.
But there is usually a strange excuse for me to have a little tipple. A birthday, a weekend, a birth or the sunshine. And I sometimes commiserate with a drink too. All it takes is for a soppy movie about a dying dog and out comes the crate of Sagres.
But, for now, it is a dry January. After all, I’m making up for a very wet December.
I don’t do new year’s resolutions. I tend to just work with the moment. If I need to lose a few pounds to fit more comfortably in my jeans then I’ll just either lose a few pounds or I’ll buy a bigger pair of jeans. I’ve learnt to be happy in doing either of those.
But seeing as we’ve recently acquired six orange trees in a part of the world that don’t do takeaway meals, that moment it seems, has arrived.
This evening, as I peeled an orange from our tree, I said to Lou that I don’t think I’ve ever eaten so healthily over the Christmas period. Don’t get me wrong, I do try to stick to some sort of a plan for nutritional reasons at any time of year, but the tubs of celebrations and bowls of salted peanuts and crisps always make an appearance. But either these traditional British Christmas snacks don’t exist in Sertá or they are imported at the expense of the consumer. And I’m not prepared to pay over ten euros for a bag of Nobby’s Nuts.
The oranges are free from the garden.
So after some research I’ve found that the trees dotted about the land are called navel orange trees. With no snacks in the cupboard and no obligatory one or two takeaway meals during the Christmas and new year period, I’ve found myself peeling an orange each evening.
Now, it has to be said, I have always hated oranges. The peel would get under my nails. My fingers would be sticky and would smell. It would squirt in my eye as I wrestled with the peel. The pips would get in the way of any sort of enjoyment of eating an orange.
I have peeled so many oranges in my life. My previous work meant that I peeled at least three a day in residential and day care settings. My kids eat oranges and my life got a little easier with ‘easy peelers’. Thank goodness for easy peelers! It didn’t, however, change my mind on oranges. Messy fuckers.
And then I picked a juicy piece of sun from a tree.
The move to rural Portugal was not by accident. Much of our motivation to choose the Castelo Branco region was its lack of fast food restaurants, pubs and bars and traffic. We wanted to take our family where we could try to live a simpler, healthier lifestyle. The temptation of a Greggs pasty is no longer there for me. The local supermarkets are stocked with their traditionally prepared bacalhau and other varieties of sea food and local fresh produce. Yes, they have junk food too. But I’m beginning to overlook it. I’ll wait and pick an orange when I get home.
I have always told my clients that you will always want to eat what you have available to you. If you buy it and take it home, it will be calling you at 10pm willing you to take it from the cupboard and eat it.
It is often said that a fitness goal begins in the kitchen. I would say it begins in the supermarket. You can’t eat something that you don’t buy in.
And it is extremely difficult, I know. Nobby always wanted me to grab his nuts. But I want a fresh start in making better health choices.
My new love affair with the orange is real. You could say it’s tang-erine-able.
Never Give Up PT 