Tag Archives: personal trainer

Mr Bean Volume 4 And The Portuguese Consulate

The empty Mr Bean DVD box has been hanging around the house for years. And when we do find the disc, we can’t find the box to put it in. This has been happening since 2020. I only know that because a lot of things got stored in unusual places during several DIY projects in the first lockdown. Things that were scattered about wherever the kids like to hang out were pretty much scooped up and put into random cupboards and drawers. Just the other day a plastic piece of joke poo jumped out at me as I opened the kid’s wardrobe. At least, they tell me it was plastic poo.

But during a time when I have loads to do in preparing for a move to Portugal, including packing stuff we actually need, booking consulate appointments, liaising with the solicitor to set up our business and work appointments, searching for a Mr Bean DVD was not a priority. It certainly didn’t warrant 2 hours of my time!

I think I’ve figured out the problem with me here. I’m overthinking the process. I can’t see the wood for the trees. And yet I’ve simplified the process slightly by hiring solicitors to guide us. It’s why we decided to hire them. We were told that we could save money by doing the VISA and business set up ourselves, but we need to get it right otherwise money and time could be lost in the long run.

Just like hiring a car mechanic to service your car, a plumber to check out your dodgy boiler or a personal trainer to program your fitness journey, sometimes it is reassuring to know that a professional has your back.

But our solicitor won’t help me find the Mr Bean DVD. These are the finer details that I’m concerning myself with because I feel overwhelmed by the big stuff. That’s my problem. And I realise that this happens to so many people in regards to their health and fitness. I’ve heard everybody’s ‘Mr Bean Volume 4 DVD’ stories. They can’t find their gym trainers. It’s too warm or too cold. They’ll wait for when their mate can go with them. They can’t afford a membership (despite finding money for alcohol and takeaways) or they’re injured.

Most of the time, they’re just looking for a DVD that has no impact at all on what their actual goals are. They’re not wanting to face the real truths of what has to be done. They want it. More than anything! They want to feel fitter, stronger, happier. But some days it is difficult to find a starting point. Planning is useful. Hiring a PT is great. Booking gym classes helps keep a schedule. But that pesky DVD needs to be found, right?!!!

Well, no, it doesn’t. But at the time it does. At the time it feels like the most important part of the process.

I know what I have to do and I do have the reassurance that, if I am not providing the correct information for the likes of the Portuguese Consulate, I have a solicitor guiding me through it all.

But from time to time, I just need to look for the Mr Bean Volume 4 DVD.

Xinjiang Highway

The Xinjiang highway fascinates me. Stretching for 6214 miles and winding up and down mountainous cliff sides, it is said to be China’s longest highway. It is quite treacherous too. The weather conditions, high altitude, wild animals, a lack of water, food and fuel for miles and miles can make this road a difficult journey.

But when I see images of this road, it reminds me of something else. It reminds me of your journey towards your goals. And mine of course.

So this is just a quick message to remind you that your path to success will not be linear.

During my training I can get a run of some great days in the gym. I feel strong. I stay an extra half hour to get out a few more sets. I feel good. But some days it feels like I’m travelling up hill and turning back on myself on a dog leg bend.

I’m currently devoting a lot of my time to learning Portuguese. And again, there are times when I’m cruising to being fluent and bilingual. But then come the moments when I can’t even remember how I would greet anyone in Portuguese. I feel like giving up some days, but I have to remind myself of the reasons for doing it. I HAVE to, so I will do it.

It’s important to know that you will suffer the same in whatever goals you want to achieve. And just because the path seems to wind into a different direction, don’t panic. If you have faith in the journey then follow it.

Prepare yourself in the best way possible. Know the distance, fill the tank with fuel, take plenty of water and food, rest often and bring along a mate going the same way if you want and you’ll reach your destination.

The Problem With Motivation

My gym journey, building a new business, being a good husband and father and moving to another country all need a consistent and considered approach.

Whatever the pitfalls each one delivers (and they do) if I live by the rule of consistency then I will eventually find a conclusion that works for me. It might not always be the best or most perfect outcome. I’m a realist. But it will, at least, enable me to move forward and continue my plans to reach that elusive ‘perfection’.

What helps me keep consistent is two main factors. The first is the question ‘Why?’

Why do I do what I do? Why bother with the gym every day? Why put the effort into my relationship with my wife and children? Why start up a new business? Why move to a different country?

The truth is that I would be immensely unhappy if I didn’t.

Some days I really don’t fancy going to the gym, but I enjoy the endorphins and the way it makes me look.

Some days my kids are driving me mad! But if I shout and lose my temper then I am teaching them that being kind and patient does not work.

And some days I really don’t want to deal with solicitors, VISA applications or business plans. But if I don’t do it then the move to Portugal can’t happen and therefore the new business can’t happen. I’ll be back in a commercial gym faster than you can say ‘500 quid a month rent’.

I don’t want the alternative, so I have to be consistent in how I get things done. Having a few days off is not on the table. And this leads me on to factor number 2.

These actions are non-negotiable. I cannot let the consistency slip. Now, I’m not talking about missing the gym for an emergency, bickering with my wife or watching Coranation Street instead of working on my business plan. I’m talking about serious procrastination that begins to turn itself into a lifestyle.

In a year’s time I don’t want to be overweight and miserable. I don’t want to be snappy with my kids and push my wife away. I don’t want to  still be in the UK paying double on my mortgage and losing my freedom of movement just to rub salt in the wounds.

Consistently doing these activities gets me to where I want to be, so they are non-negotiable. I have to do them.

So I must address the one major problem I hear from people when they talk about changing their habits or lifestyle and working towards a goal. They tell me that they’re not motivated enough.

The problem with motivation is that it is a fleeting emotion. When it arrives it is fantastic. You’ll book the gym classes, write out a shopping list consisting of lots of fruit and veg, you’ll start to look at other job opportunities. Ones that will make you happy. You’ll call your friend or family member who you’ve been meaning to make contact with again. That’s what motivation can give you.

But what about when it isn’t there? If you haven’t answered your ‘why?’ and created a set of non-negotiables then you won’t get any closer to your happiness. You have to keep waiting for that glimmer of motivation that comes around now and again.

It is those cold, dark mornings when you get to the gym when you really don’t feel like it that edges you closer to a goal. It’s working through an online open university course on an evening when your friends have gone out for a few drinks that gets you out of your mundane work life rut. Motivation, on its own, won’t do that.

Take a moment to write down five things that you would like to achieve in the next 12 months. Next to each one, write the question ‘why?’ Honestly answer it. Dig deep and give your most honest answer, however hard it is to read it.

Then implement one thing that you will do to work towards each goal. It doesn’t have to be life changing, but whatever it is must become your consistent non-negotiable. You must do it when you say that you will.

From now until your 12 month goal you will sometimes find yourself without motivation, even demoralised. But keep your consistent approach.

Motivation is like a wind up toy. It’ll give you one big burst of energy or inspiration but eventually it stops. Consistency, albeit not a term that is as sexy or flashy, is the key to unlocking your future goals.

Shay is a Personal Trainer, CBT therapist, meditation guide and lifestyle blogger.

Choosing The Right Personal Trainer

I know lots of people who have spent (in some cases) thousands of pounds before they’ve found the right PT for them. Unfortunately, some people give up after a bad experience and this is a shame because I have seen what I and many other very good trainers can do for someone with a fitness goal.

To an extent you have to find the right personality that you are happy to employ as your PT. Basically, you need to at least like them and get on with them for you to respect what they say and ask of you.

But every good PT will have the same traits. They will listen to you, be attentive, be committed to your needs and they will give you their full attention whenever you need them (not just when they’re on the clock).

And whether it is face to face training or online coaching these traits should come across in your initial discussions with a PT.

Now that I’m moving my business to Portugal and developing it alongside a camping and wellbeing centre I will be ending my online coaching part of it. The reasons for this, and I’m only being honest, is that I don’t think that I can fulfill this criteria anymore. I have one shot for me and my family to get this move right. Currently I don’t think I can be as attentive as the client needs me to be. And seeing as I will be doing a lot of the ground work myself (both metaphorically and literally) once we get to Portugal, I’ll be busy enough.

There is an online coach that I will be recommending though if anyone asks and that is Biological Engineering. Dan Middlewood is the Trainer who deals with every inquiry and treats every one of his clients with the attention they deserve. He boasts of some impressive transformations on his social media too! All backed up with real life people.

https://instagram.com/biological_engineering?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

Dan and I started PTing in a gym together ten years ago and it was our first gig. I watched him develop into a PT that was driven by getting results for his clients, but did it in a way that was friendly and not pushy. It was only a matter of time that he would branch out into online coaching too, such was his high demand.

Just like in every day situations, we soon get an idea of a person’s character once we have a chat with them. Finding the right PT is very similar. You need to know that they have your best interests. They work for you. It’s not about their ego, it’s about your fitness results. So whether you’ve been thinking about contacting a PT or you’ve had a bad experience but are thinking about giving it another go, you’ll be in safe hands with Dan’s Biological Engineering.

Wonka-Vite!

Finlay, my 7 year old son, is currently enjoying Charlie And The Great Glass Elevator by Roald Dahl. I like that he is now at an age where he can read the books of Roald Dahl as it brings back so many memories for myself as I was also an avid reader of his work as a child.

This particular book, in true Dahl fashion, has the chapter about a pill invented by Wonka that makes you look younger. The Wonka-Vite. Finlay read the chapter with me and announced, “You need one of these pills daddy.”

Oh how brutally honest children can be! “Yes, sometimes I feel like I could do with a Wonka-Vite.” I replied.

It is concerning, however, when manufacturers, advertisers and the media are as brutal as a child when they try to flog their pills and potions. I’m sure that they want us to feel old and fat and insecure because insecure people are often willing to spend money on finding a cure for their insecurities. Almost daily I see an advert or link to a site that sells weight loss tablets.

And these little gadgets in our hands are now the conduit which connects these companies straight to us. These ads know who we are, what we look like, what we search for and what we want. They’re happy to oblige.

Another ad that regularly crops up on my social media feed is the miracle cure for baldness. So if any of you don’t know by now, I’m bald. The interesting thing here though is that they declare that they can ‘cure’ me.

Am I sick? Have I got a disease? Should I tell people to stand two metres apart and wash their hands while singing to Oasis if they accidentally touch my folically challenged smooth head? Is it life threatening? Please, tell me, doctors on my FB page, how long have I got left?!

Kids make the same diagnosis as these ads. Having worked with kids for the past year, I know that they are very keen to point out that I’m bald. I play on this, of course. I’ve been losing my hair for long enough to not care one bit about it. As we get caught in the rain playing football I will suggest that we go back inside so that I don’t get my hair wet. The chorus of kids shouting back at me ‘But you’re bald!!!” will forever amuse me.

And when I ask for a second opinion my own kids confirm the diagnosis of this baldness disease. They’re astute. The future of the NHS is safe.

These pills, potions and magical cures can be very costly. But one thing is free. The ability to love oneself is free and available to everyone. It’s sometimes difficult to find, but it can be found.

If losing weight is a goal then loving yourself at the beginning of the process makes the journey so much easier. We forgive those that we love. We wish the people we love the very best. We stand in their corner when they need someone to cheer them on. We give them good, honest advice.

So I don’t really need a Wonka-Vite to feel younger and I don’t need a cure for baldness. I already have a potion that makes me dance like a young John Travolta and sing Rock DJ like a top of his game albeit a little arrogant Robbie Williams circa 2000….

….It’s red wine.

And self love of course!

Insta grrrrrr!

I guess lots of budding authors, film makers and vloggers create content on certain blog sites and social media platforms to monetize their skills. They hone in on their skills and target audience, pay great attention to their editing, hashtags and algorithms and eventually have a product worth reading, viewing and selling.

My wife and I, on the other hand, have just spent two hours trying to get my Instagram account as admin to the new Road To Tranquility page which was set up on my wife’s account. We still have no clue on how to do it.

You see, we’re finding that we are becoming the aforementioned content creators by circumstance, not by our talent.

As small business owners who need to promote our products through exposure and without a team of media people to manage our accounts, it’s up to us to navigate our way through the digital world like The Chuckle Brothers putting up a tent.

Ah, tents. That’s a more familiar world. And, even though we will still hit the snags of setting up a glamping site in Portugal such as VISA, licencing, cost, weather conditions and language, nothing can be more difficult than syncing a bloody Instagram account!

But it makes me think, ‘why do I do it?’

Why bother setting up an account to document our adventures in setting up our business in Portugal? Why create a meditation podcast? Why write this article right now?

Well, the reason is simple really. I’m able to reach out to people like you. It allows me to communicate to like-minded people who also might have an interest in health, fitness and wellbeing. Other people might also have an interest in reading about my journey. There might be somebody who can relax to the meditation podcast. I might be able to make someone laugh. Perhaps something I do or write about might strike a chord in somebody else’s life. And for this reason, the tinterweb is fantastic.

But I can promise you one thing. I won’t be signing up to Threads!

Spotting Is A Skill

Your session is going well. After a series of successful barbell back squats you decide to go for a PB with a one rep max. You look around the gym to find someone to ask to spot you for your next set.

The person you choose is vital for you to complete the rep successfully, avoid injury and the possibility of death. I’m not kidding here. A recent death of a bodybuilder with over 200k on his neck tells you that I am being extremely serious. Choose your spotter wisely.

So who do you ask? The obvious choice would be to ask a trainer who works in the gym. But be careful here. You need to know what they specialise in. Have you ever seen them perform a barbell squat or instruct their clients? A trainer with an ego might agree without really knowing what to do. And that goes for other gym members too. They want to help but haven’t got the skill (or strength) to if assistance is needed.

The person with the legs like tree trunks who you see hanging around the squat rack every time you’re in there is a good start. Tell them what you’re wanting to do. It is important that they know your expectations for the lift such as time under tension, reps, your weaknesses etc.

Spotting is indeed a skill. So what are the main points to know if you have a spotter or you are the spotter of a barbell back squat?

1. For a heavy lift, the spotter should place their arms under the lifter’s arms.

Holding the waist can be fine for moderate weight and can be more comfortable if it is a male spotter and a female lifter. The spotter should not place their hands on the bar. They’re not supporting the bar, they’re supporting the lifter.

2. The spotter should mimic the lifter’s movement on the way down. This is why a good squatter usually makes a good spotter. They must keep a straight back and use their core to get the lifter to the starting position if needed.

3. The spotter should be stood close. There’s no need to look like you’re dirty dancing though, not if the spotter and lifter are using their hips correctly.

4. If it is a very heavy weight, not only can a spotter be crucial in the lift but a person at either side of the bar should be considered. The body can buckle at any point when under pressure and there’s only so much a spotter can do if they’re having to deal with a collapsing person and a weight falling on top of them.

It’s worth pointing out that the body can give way with any amount of weight and this extra weight can still cause serious injury, so extra help at either side of the bar is something that can be considered at any time.

Lifting heavy can be fun and rewarding, but it is essential that you do it correctly. A part of that is finding a good spotter!

The Road To Tranquility Portugal

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100094707496611

Click, like and follow the link above to see our journey to finding and creating our tranquility in Portugal.

We have a VISA process to wrestle first so the page is still very much in its infancy, even if our process has been through years of planning.

Obrigado!

Best Face

I parked the car and sat in silence to what seemed an eternity, staring at the brick wall in front of me. I felt almost paralyzed. Stuck in a time warp.

Suddenly with a large gasp of breath my body moved. I blinked. I snapped out of the motionless loop.

I calmed my breath, picked up my phone to write this and felt a sudden release for the feelings that my head was able to pour out.

In half an hour, I am meant to walk into the gym for what will be one of the final times to conduct a PT session. It’ll be a great session. It has been planned and my client is always willing to do their very best. The gym is nice too. It has some lovely people to meet.

Half an hour. Hmm. I’d best tap down my words with ultra speed. I haven’t got long. My hand is shaking which isn’t helping. Thank goodness for auto correct. My vision is cloudy. I blink a few times and I stare at this screen. Other than my eyelids and a tapping thumb it feels like an eternity since I last moved. My back will scream at me once I do. Once I can.

Half an hour. I’d best put my best face on which, if I’m being totally honest, feels lost right now. Will I find it in the glove box? Maybe in the boot of the car? No. But if I dig deep enough into my soul I know that I will find it. 8 years a PT, three years at the front of house in a busy restaurant and many many years supporting vulnerable people means that I have become very good at finding it when I need to. People rely on me. I commit to times and appointments and I keep them. My kids. My wife. I find it all the time.

Come on best face. I know you’re in there.

If only this feeling of adrenaline in my belly would go, perhaps I would be able to operate better. We know it better as ‘butterflies’. It’s currently whooshing up into my head which isn’t making it easy to think. Damn butterflies.

The more I try to place logic onto my current mood, the more it frustrates me. Here I am, now fifteen minutes away from stepping out of my car, walking the same path and entering the same building that I have done for the past four and a bit years and yet I feel that if I were to attempt it now, right this very instant, my feet would not move.

15 minutes. No *checks clock*, 13.

Franz Kafka wrote,”I was ashamed of myself when I realized life was a costume party, and I attended with my real face.”

My best face is my costume. I realized that my real face wouldn’t sell PT and would put the diners off of their meals at the restaurant. The only people who would truly understand my real face are the vulnerable people who I supported. They were often misunderstood by society too. Maybe that is what made them vulnerable. It has nothing to do with their behaviours or abilities, it’s just that society doesn’t understand them so it labels them ‘vulnerable’.

Vulnerable to what? Social media? War? Corruption? Too fucking right. Then perhaps we can all empathize with this vulnerability.

5 minutes. I need to bring my breathing back to its normal pattern.

4 minutes. I look outside of the car window. This time out of the passenger side. At least it has people mulling about out there. A sign that the world is continuing outside of my car.

3 minutes. I need to wrap this up. I hate being late.

2 minutes. I hear my mantra. ‘I am in control. I am in control of my body and my mind.’ Repeat, repeat, repeat.

1 minute. I’ll promise to give the best version of myself today and smash it.

No minutes left. Best face.

Quote Of The Week

Hello my friends.

Today I have just a short message of inspiration for you to think about and it comes from author Napolian Hill. He wrote…

“Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.”

Now, it is important to remember that this is about what the mind can conceive and believe, therefore it refers to realistic outcomes. Within the fitness industry the acronym SMART is used. Which stands for Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time. But actually, this can be used in any life goal.

I want to play for Liverpool FC but no matter how much I think about it I doubt Herr Klopp will be calling me up. So creating realistic, time bound goals is extremely important.

The other day I wrote an article about doubt and how this behaviour can cripple our future goals. We put far too many blockers in the way of our own journey instead of actually believing in ourselves.

There is a universal principle that states you will attract into your life whatever you focus on. It is something that I touch on regularly in my meditation guides. The impact over the course of a few sessions is very encouraging, enabling those who attend to realign their thoughts into a much more structured, positive outlook.

So conceive it, believe it, plan it and act on it.

Let’s see what you can achieve!