Tag Archives: anxiety

Dirty Fries

Scarborough is a small town. It’s the sort of place that if you go into the town centre you will probably know somebody to say hello to. Train in a gym with almost 3,000 members and the chances are that I will definitely see somebody I know.

Had they seen me in a bar this lunch time they would have found me with a large gin and tonic and some ‘dirty fries’. When I ordered them I imagined some chips with a sprinkling of grated cheese. What I actually got was a bag of potatoes, a pack of bacon and a block of cheese squeezed into a good sized pasta bowl. This wasn’t the amuse bouche that I had visioned in my mind, but it was one my belly was happy to try.

I wished a client of mine would’ve walked in as I slurped the stringy melted cheese into my mouth. If only to keep proving my point. I keep reiterating my point regarding food and weight management…eat it. All of it. If it fits your daily calories, eat it and enjoy it. But there’s a slight caveat. Just one little rule.

If you aren’t going to cut out the low nutrition foods, then you must keep the nutritionally dense foods high. Whether you are very active with fitness goals or more sedentary, keep the nutritionally dense foods high.

You see, I don’t believe in banning food types. If you want to stop off at a bar and order a truck full of McCain’s Chips then do it, as long as your  weekly macros are met. Yes, weekly. Some days your carbs might be up, but if you keep the nutritionally dense and high protein foods a priority over the course of the week then your calories and macros will average out. Judging your Journey on just one day will serve you no purpose.

I knew that I could eat some greasy cheesy chips today. I count my calories.

Now, if you read the newspapers you might gasp in horror at the knowledge that I count calories and I also endorse it for others. The one exception being anybody suffering from an eating disorder. In which case they don’t need me, they need professional medical support.

But the media seem to be very negative towards counting calories. Which is interested, because they print lots of other methods such as 5:2, Intermittent fasting and promote large dieting companies who count ‘syns’.

My conclusion is that counting calories isn’t sexy. It isn’t a buzz word or trending on Twitter. And if it isn’t a large company paying a newspaper to advertise their diet or a book publisher paying them to flog Michael Mosley’s new fad diet, then it gets demonized as wrong.

If I go into a shop and see something that I want to buy I will check my bank balance before I purchase it. That’s just simple accounting.

If I go to the carpet fitters I will take the measurements of the room that I wish to have carpeted with me. That is just common sense.

If I take my son to buy a pair of shoes I will ask the assistant to measure his feet first. Efficient.

And if I want some dirty fries washed down with a gin and tonic I will make sure that my meals around this tasty treat are low in calories and high in nutrition. No anxiety or concerns.

I get what I want now and again and I also get to keep my body on track with my fitness goals. And a part of my fitness goals is my mental health, therefore stressing at banning all of the foods that I enjoy is not something that I consider healthy. I have a good relationship with food. I don’t want to feel anxious about being in a social environment and seeing half of the food on the menu to be cancelled for me.

I don’t develope programmes or challenges for my clients if I wouldn’t do it myself. So occasionally doing my own Balanced Plate Challenge works for me. My clients succeed, why shouldn’t I enjoy my own methods too?!

And so it’s time to make my smoothie. With plenty of spinach and fruit in there my body will still know that I love it. And it might even get another bowl of dirty fries again next week!

Goal Setting

https://mindist.page.link/EDHu

Above is a link to my recently recorded meditation guide I entitled Goal Setting.

We get so fixated on the goal sometimes instead of the little challenges that we overcome to have to reach the big stuff. Those little steps, the 1%, amounts to great things if you perceiver and confidently follow the process.

Every day there should be a time to reflect on your goals and expect that some days won’t always be the best. But as long as you acknowledge them and move on then you will still get to where you want to be.

Thank you for reading and listening!

Shay PT

Calm Mind

https://mindist.page.link/bxUb

Here is a link to my Calm Mind meditation that I recently recorded. A bit wierd meditating to my own voice! But I’ve done it a couple of times and find it quite relaxing.

Keep smiling!

Shay.

Our Comfort Zone

Ah, the comfort zone. Has anybody told you to get out of your comfort zone? It’s been said to me many times, usually back in my 20’s some vgdguvidrdddyuhd years ago.

But what is it? And how do you know how to get out of it if you don’t know what it is?!

Your comfort zone is unique to you. Your comfort zone will be an absolute terrible experience to some people. And therefore being out of your comfort zone is a unique experience that belongs to you too.

I can guarantee that there are people in the UK right now who have to get out of their comfort zone by getting out of bed, leaving the house or having to talk to another human being. Perhaps you are one of these people and this resonates with you. You are not alone.

According to a study by mentalhealth.org.uk in 2014 almost 20% of over 16 year olds were showing symptoms of anxiety or depression. With the difficulties many of us have faced in the past couple of years I can’t imagine this statistic improving.

So then, for our mental and physical fitness, to get out of our comfort zone means something very different to each person that I speak to. To some it is lifting a certain weight that they have never lifted before. To others it is running a distance that they haven’t been able to reach before. Or it could be training for an important event that they’ve never competed in before. Maybe it’s taking that first step into the gym or fitness class. But simply buying some trainers or walking boots and taking a walk each day is a massive positive step too.

Walking is just as much of a mood booster as a set of deadlifts. I enjoy both. I enjoy the feeling that I get once it is completed. During physical activities can be tough and testing of course, but I enjoy the rhythm of the repetition of resistance training. When I walk I enjoy gathering my thoughts or sharing ideas with a walking partner. It is therapy.

When I think of the current clutter in my head that is all of the stuff that requires being out of my comfort zone I think of starting my new YouTube channel. Social media can be brutal. But I’m doing it for my next out of my comfort zone challenge, which is becoming a meditation guide. If people don’t know that I exist then I’ll never coach or guide anybody. So I have to be brave in trying something that is very different for me.

And my other fear is ringing my bank to ask why the Sky direct debit has been cancelled. Really, the thought of speaking to my bank sends me into a panic! I can teach a class of 30 people and pretend to be Freddie Mercury in front of a hundred holiday makers in Lanzarote (I might have had a few drinks for that one) but the thought of having to speak to my bank on the phone sends me in a right tizz.

They will ask me for my password. I don’t know what it is! They need my date of birth. I always get tongue tied with that? They’ll need information from me that I know but when they ask me I’ll have no idea at all! My wife keeps on top of all of this stuff, but the Sky payments are in my name.

I know it’ll sound ridiculous to some people, but it’ll strike a chord with others. I’m not the only one who hates official phone calls with strangers.

And that’s why we are all different. I’m nervous about going into the gym every day, yet I’m a PT! How can that be?! I mix it up with a bit of being the Joker and being professional (I’m confident that I know my job, which helps) but it doesn’t stop me from getting butterflies sometimes. The adrenaline keeps me passionate. Maybe it’s when I stop getting nervous that I should be worried.

The final word…

Our comfort zone is one to break free of now and again but only when the time is right for you. And once you are out of it, then it is for you to decide how far you can go. But if you get the small stuff right to begin with it can lead to bigger things. Give it a go. As for me, my little step is to ring my bloody bank this afternoon. Wish me luck!

https://youtube.com/channel/UC_2ukEG1FHIgU2rJEOOYCJA

If you can’t fly…

I’m sorry that I’ve been a little absent from my blogs recently. In all honesty, the last few days have felt a bit hectic. Not an unhappy, miserable sort of hectic. But not a dancing round in the sitting room in my undies listening to Harry Styles kind of hectic either (not that I’ve ever,ever,ever done that. Ever.)

It’s just seemed a 100 miles an hour over the past few days and I’m trying to spin the many plates that I’ve given myself.

I enjoy plate spinning when the plates aren’t crashing. In my circus I would be a decent plate spinner. Some days I’d even be bold enough to unicycle on the tight rope a hundred feet high and still spin the plates. But in the past few days, had the Ringmaster introduced me to the audience I would’ve tripped over my large clown shoes before getting to the stage. Of course, I would’ve gotten straight to my feet, smiled and tooted my big red nose and made the crowd laugh. That’s what I do.

Feeling under the weather on Sunday hasn’t helped where my head is now. I like to keep on top of things and my work doesn’t allow for illness. I stay strong and in control. But it isn’t a weakness to feel ill. It’s just that it rarely happens to me so when it does I feel a bit discombobulated.

My work not only helps me to understand others, but it helps me to understand myself too. When my trainees feel a bit out of sorts I totally get it. I’m not into the ‘no pain, no gain’ attitude to exercise. Sometimes just putting your training shoes on and doing what you can is massive. We’re not always on top of our game. It doesn’t need any great explanation or reasoning. It’s just how it is. Each day we wake up and try again.

It reminds me of a quote by Martin Luther King. He said…

“If you can’t fly then run. If you can’t run then walk. If you can’t walk then crawl. But whatever you do, you have to keep moving.”

You can’t be flying all of the time and when you realize this you can then be pleased with the little steps that you are able to do. When you are ready, you will take off again. Never give up.

My YouTube channel is here if you want to take a look!

https://youtube.com/channel/UC_2ukEG1FHIgU2rJEOOYCJA

Body Image Affirmation

https://mindist.page.link/tx8j

I didn’t become a PT to make people feel inadequate in how they look. If you are unaccepting of your body now, no changes that you make to your body will make you any happier. The above link is a ten minute guide on body image affirmation.

I’m going to be creating more meditation guides in the future and I will, of course, be basing them on subjects that are close to me. Enjoy!

Speak soon!

Morning Positivity Meditation

Below is a link to my Morning Positivity Meditation. This time next month I will be fully qualified to guide groups and 1-1 meditations and thought I’d share a preview.

I’m excited about this as I am passionate about the power of meditation and mental health. Anything we want to achieve physically always begins with a positive mindset in the first place.

https://mindist.page.link/sbHD

Gym Fitness Classes

Gym Classes are an excellent way to introduce yourself to formal exercises, meet new people with similar goals and to plan your fitness routine for consistency. From Stretch classes, Zumba, Spin and Boxercise the mainstream gym have covered it all. And being a Fitness Instructor myself I can see the fantastic benefits of booking onto a regular gym class….but it should come with a warning.

Here are my gripes on classes…

* Gyms that I am aware of are regularly putting on virtual classes. This seems to limit the cost of paying for a live instructor and can run throughout the day. I find this counterproductive from a gym going by the feedback that I receive as many gym members want live instructors and some have moved to other gyms to find them. A trained fitness instructor can manage the pace and intensity of the class and adapt workouts each week to fit the needs of their participants.

* I see more injuries occur in fitness classes than I do in the gym. An instructor cannot check the form of 30 class members. The classic exercises for poor form are deadlifts, bent over rows and kettlebell swings. In fact kettlebell classes are an injury waiting to happen. When you need to teach hip hinges, breathing and core control to a room full of people who see their half hour class as a way to ‘blast their abs’ or ‘fat burn’ it becomes an impossible task.

* When you think about the titles that they are given, such as those above (abs blast and fat burn are real life class titles) it is very misleading. An abs class once a week won’t get anybody a six pack. An abs class won’t do a great deal for stabilising core muscles. A fat burn class usually consists of fast paced reps that use exercises that require slow, controlled movement to focus on target muscles and avoid injury. Getting these movements right and incorporating them in a fitness programme is essential for all types of fitness goals, but repping out as many deadlifts as you can in 60 seconds won’t. Yes it burns calories, but put your back out and you won’t be burning those calories again until you’ve recovered from your injury.

* Classes can be demoralising for lots of people. They feel inferior compared to those around them. Yet many class goers have been going to the same class for years and might know what to do. If they know the instructor then they will probably know what equipment is used and what exercise is next. They probably even know that the class starts with Rock DJ and finishes on a club version of Castle On The Hill. But new people might feel out of their depth. Which leads me onto my recommendation…

Oh do tell Shay!!

Well, for anyone going to a new gym and are a little apprehensive or have never been to one before I would suggest hiring a good PT (a good one! Not a Poundland special) and learning how to move correctly. Of course I would say that, I’m a PT right?! Yeah but Brian who is reading this at his home in Penikuik won’t be hiring me 1-1 so it’s of no great advantage to me. It is, however, sound advice.

5 sets of ten deadlifts will be far more important to a gym goers goals than a class when they first start out on their journey. When to breath, how to engage the core, foot placement, hip hinge, strength and stamina building, morale boosting and goal setting are all of things that will be learnt fairly early on in regular PT sessions. None of which are taught with any great depth (if at all) by Mr Motivator at the front of the class whooping and jumping like a Duracell Bunny on speed.

The Journey should begin on the gym floor, not collapsing on a class floor.

Thanks for reading! If you enjoy my blogs then check out some of the other stuff too. See you soon!

The Streisand Effect

In 2003 the California Coastal Records Project wanted to take pictures in the Malibu area to record the cause of coastal erosion. But in doing so, they inadvertently took photographs of Barbera Streisand’s home.

As you can imagine, in the affluent area of Malibu, her house was one of many big houses with acres of land and nobody knew that it was Streisand’s home. In fact, nobody really cared.

It was only when her lawyers brought attention to this picture and accused the photographer of breaking privacy rights did the whole world suddenly care about where Streisand lived. Her house was now being shared on the newest sharing networks at the time and every newspaper in the world had published the picture of Streisand’s home.

The acts of Streisand and her lawyers not only created the opposite effect of what they wanted, but it escalated into what we now know as The Streisand Effect. Attempting to prohibit something which leads to increased attention.

Have you ever had an experience where you have tried to prohibit something which leads you to want this forbidden fruit even more?

As a coach specialising in weight control I have come across people trying to ban chocolate, crisps, takeaways, carbs, fats, eating before a certain time, eating after a certain time. They’ve tried to cancel alcohol, bread, cheese, coca cola and even some types of fruit and veg because they have been told that it will contribute to their weight gain.

9 times out of 10, when they banned a type of food, this tactic exploded in their face and led to a situation that became out of control. Suddenly, this food type is wanted even more because of the restrictions put upon it.

It’s like when I tell my kids that I have just painted the door frame you can bet that they touch it. And it’s not just my kids. If my wife tells me that the bath water is too hot I will get in anyway and have two red arse cheeks while I try to place my feet on each side of the tub to hover above the lava like, hotter than hell, water below.

Like the media frenzy at Streisand’s lawyers calling for privacy rights, we begin to obsess at what we are told we shouldn’t see, do and eat.

In the month before the lawsuit, the picture had been downloaded 6 times. The month following the lawsuit the picture had been downloaded 420,000 times.

In my personal experience if I agree to a takeaway every 4 weeks then I give myself a happy compromise. If I tell myself that takeaways are banned then I would want one this coming weekend. I also like cheese. I know that I go through periods of eating too much of it. Yet if I can develope a habit where I have one evening a week where I eat cheese and biscuits rather than cut cheese out of my diet altogether then I won’t feel resentment or frustration towards my health and fitness goals. In fact I have found that I go without cheese and biscuits for weeks and weeks now because it just isn’t a part of my thoughts. I created a positive habit that became so constructive that my obsession for cheese wasn’t even a thing anymore.

And if you’re wondering what happened to the lawsuit, it was dropped later that year. The paradoxical effect had already done the damage.

If you have any questions regarding weight control then please get in touch. Thanks for reading. See you soon!

A picture of my house instead of Streisand’s house as I don’t want to get sued.

Father’s Day

Father’s Day and the whole of the weekend was a nutritional disaster. Well, actually it wasn’t. I bloody loved my low value nutritional feast! What’s disastrous about that? But here’s why I allowed such a diet and why I can look back at a great weekend guilt free…

On Saturday (the day before Father’s Day) I met up with my dad with my family and his friends in a beer garden at Cayton Bay. Firstly I was happy to drive. A few hours drinking in the sun doesn’t appeal to me like it did once upon a time. I have kids, I have an online business that can require my attention at any time and I’m a tight Yorkshireman. Pints were £1.50 the last time I had any interest in drinking all day in a pub beer garden. So me not drinking didn’t have anything to do with my diet which requires me to be in a calorie deficit. I made up with it with the BBQ that the pub had provided.

On the Sunday we travelled to see my in laws. Graham’s famous paella was on offer plus burgers and chips. It was on offer so, of course, I ate it. Over the two days here’s what I had to eat in total…

* 6 scrambled eggs with two slices of tiger bread

* 4 cheese burgers

* 1 wild boar hot dog

* beef curry and fried rice takeaway

* 4 portions of chips

* Seafood salad

* 1 family sized bar of chocolate

* half box of Pringles

My protein is actually quite high from the weekend, but so are my calories! And I don’t care.

There are occasions in the year that we need to give ourselves a break. I’m dedicated to my goals but, because I’m dedicated, I don’t allow my goals to become a chain around my neck. I make sure that I don’t resent my goals or the process. I’m not an athlete. Yes, I’m a Personal Trainer but I’m also a regular person that wants to enjoy family holidays, Christmas, anniversaries and family gatherings. I’m not a footballer going to bed early on Christmas night because of the early kick off on Boxing Day. Pay me a Premier League wage and I’ll do it!

But I am mentally prepared for what these ‘breaks’ within my goals will require. It means that today, the day after my indulgence, I have to become disciplined again. By the end of the week any added calories from the weekend will be balanced out with structure and commitment. I can still enjoy these moments with my family and bring my nutrition, macros and calories back in line without anxiety.

I chose to binge and over indulge at the weekend. I now choose to track calories and my nutrition. I choose to train hard this week and at least make use of all the energy that I put into my body! It is all my choice. Not once did I feel out of control.

I work with some people who are trying to find that balance. One high calorie and low nutrition day can create their eating habits to spiral. One day leads to another. And another. They become frustrated and angry with themselves and they feel like giving in.

But I need to tell them and anyone who will listen that they don’t have to! One, two bad days. Jeez even a week of poor choices doesn’t ruin their hard work. What they do with their next week might and the week after that perhaps. Because that is where habits begin to form. But a few days? No. Not if they remain in control.

We can choose the high calorie and low nutrition foods if we know that we won’t be anxious about it. Enjoy it and move on. But it’s the moving on that is the vital component. We need to move on from poor food choices.

I felt great this morning. I had a lovely weekend celebrating Father’s Day. I ate what I wanted with no regrets and I was ready to focus once again. In many ways I think I needed that weekend. I needed to break the monotony of my structure. As much as I enjoy my structure, I like burgers and Chinese takeaway too!

And Here’s The Icing On The Cake…

The saying “You can’t outrun a bad diet” is true.  Because eventually your poor choices will catch up with you and running will become harder anyway. But if you have structure with your meals and in your workouts then you can outrun a poor day, weekend or holiday. And then the only reason it would be poor is if you didn’t enjoy it and you became anxious about the calorie density of each choice. It would only be poor if you allowed yourself to form negative habits around food.

I enjoy food. All food. But I remain in control and look forward to another occasion where I can over indulge again. But until then, I choose to be in control of my diet and enjoy the process and its results.

Thank you for taking the time to read this article. See you soon!