Spa Date

As a business owner with half of his business online, the idea of a phone detox for most of the day is unsettling. Whether it be on holidays or Christmas day a quick phone check is never too far away.

Today, however, if anybody needed to contact me they would have to find me laid on a hot stone in a herbal sauna room at Alpamare. My wife and I had booked a spa day.

We have concluded that evenings out without child care is impossible so instead we must take out some times from our booking schedules from the daytime to give to ourselves. Sometimes, as the weeks roll on, it is easy to forget about us and our marriage as our jobs as Shay the PT, Lou the massage therapist and our mummy and daddy jobs take over. We love our jobs and we love our kids, but we still need to allow ourselves occasions where we become Shay and Lou. Individuals. Partners. Man and wife. So three hours in a spa was very welcome.

But a few hours spa session isn’t just necessary for busy parents. And nor does it have to be a spa session. Bowling, the cinema, a restaurant meal or simply going for a walk can all be good respite from the daily grind.

It can all come under the umbrella of wellness and it can be done alone too, just as long as you do it.

I often encourage my trainees to reward themselves, celebrate their wins and acknowledge their achievements. Now, although I am a PT and this can be interpreted as achievements in a gym setting, the broader picture is what we are achieving in all aspects of life. One part of life is rarely successful if the rest is stressful, unmanageable or damaging.

I couldn’t be a good coach if my home life was crap and I couldn’t be the best husband or dad if I hated my job. And if I am suffering in these most important aspects of my life, then my motivation to succeed in the gym would suffer. If this suffers, my health and wellbeing suffers. And there goes the vicious cycle, because if I am not at my most physical and mental best then it is my family and work that will go into decline.

So there’s a lot to be said for wearing a towel robe and having a foot scrub whilst listening to rainforest music.

Rewards are sometimes confused with food choices. Some professionals subscribe to the notion that a good active week means that we can reward ourselves with a biscuit. I disagree. I’m not a dog. I don’t perform a trick and beg for a biscuit. If I want a biscuit I’ll have a bloody biscuit. Food rewards make for a poor relationship with food. Food treats cause anxiety.

Our funds won’t stretch to weekly spa dates and as much as we try to create gaps in our daytime schedule if we are lucky enough to be extra busy then we take the opportunities to be at work. We are both in careers that don’t offer security from week to week or pay sick and holiday pay, so if work is available we take it. Therefore our times together are precious.

And once the kids get home from school and I’m back in the gym, those rainforest sounds will seem like a long time ago!